The good thing about this is you can put up the list or contract on the fridge or somewhere obvious where everyone can see it. Real parental consequences for teens discourage bad choices and protect them from themselves. During that time, she will be practicing the desired behavior (i.e., no swearing and no name-calling). Using consequences helps you to impose discipline in a way that teaches your children responsibility and accountability and encourages them to look inward to learn how they can do things differently in the future. When the boy wasn’t doing this, the parents came up with this creative solution, after he had done poop patrol, he would need to run through the back garden barefoot. Then if your teen does fall out of line, you have the list or contract to point to. disorders or offer recommendations on which treatment plan is best for We value your opinions and encourage you to add your comments to this Remember, as James and Janet Lehman, creators of The Total Transformation® parenting program, tell us, the goal here is to teach your kids what to do differently next time. But it’s important to make sure the natural consequences will really teach your teen a life lesson. You May Also Enjoy Expert Tips to Help You Communicate With Your Teen. Basically the punishment for teens must fit the crime. Logical consequences are ones that are a good fit to the “crime”. Restitution gives your teen the chance to try and repair damage that was the result of their action. Parents wonder which consequences to use, how to set them up effectively, and how long to give them. Don't have an account? How do I "ban" it...its his choice of behavior after listening that gets him in trouble. Alternatively, if in your house they get an allowance but spend the entire allowance at once, then the consequence is that they won’t have any money until it’s next allowance day. Instead of saying, “You can have your phone back when I can trust you again,” say, “You can have your phone back after you have your homework completed.”. Unsafe or serious or unsafe behaviours should never be ignored. to access your Personal Parenting Plan. And giving consequences and rewards is a tool you can use to keep your child to his or her word. Remember to balance consequences with incentives, or rewards. From what, you have written, it sounds like you have set clear limits around substance use, in your family and in your home. Then you need to find a consequence that will help change that behaviour. So for example, if your daughter borrows her sister’s clothing and rips a hole in it, she should pay to have it repaired or replace it. How do you enforce them? Arming yourself with facts can help facilitate a productive conversation. Got a suggestion for us? When using rewards, it’s important to remember: “Reward” doesn’t have to mean “money.” Most kids-even teens -want, Many parents tell me that nothing seems to work, and that coming up with the right thing for their child can seem like an impossible task. What am I doing wrong?”. Take, Disagreements over music are common between parents and, teens. Is she too young to be so self conscious? things are going for you and your family. We connect brands with parents. need immediate assistance, or if you and your family are in crisis, please anger, irritability, arguing, defiance, and vindictiveness toward you When you offer incentives for the behavior you want to see, it is, more likely those behaviors will continue.